Hey, chubby cheeks!

Day 3: 7^th August, 2011

I am quite a sleep-loving person. I can sleep at any time of the day, provided I have a nice, soft, fluffy pillow to rest my head on, and I am not sweating because of power cut. This morning, I woke up at 8:30, after my mother screamed out my name five times. She hates it when I sleep beyond 8:45 in the morning; she thinks it’s a very bad habit. We get into intense arguments about it a number of times, my point being, if my friends’ parents don’t have a problem with it, why should she. She replies by saying “They don’t need to lose weight like you” and that is enough to shut me up.

I got up and pushed myself to brush, and then take bath. I did some Yoga. I really don’t like doing it, but there doesn’t seem to be any other way of shedding the weight. I am so busy throughout the week with tuitions and medical coaching classes that the only time I get is in the mornings; that too on weekends. A waste of weekend mornings, don’t you think? I had planned on losing some weight before my 17^th birthday which is in a few days, but I’m pretty sure, it’s going to be the same for a while.

I feel the worst for my mother who is more worried about my weight than I am. She desperately wants me to get into a good shape so that she can buy me cute dresses and shorts just like the other girls of my age wear. I don’t really bother much about it, personally. I’ve been quite a tomboy, and makeup only involves a little bit of Kohl occasionally, and probably some lip balm application. My mom feels pretty disappointed about it, but I tell her that as time passes by I will get conscious about my weight and lose it all. The day will come eventually, just not now.

Around two months back when we visited Express Avenue, I spotted this beautiful Guess dress that had been draped on a mannequin and put on display. My mother saw me admiring it and used it as an opportunity to get me to workout. She told me that she would buy me that dress (which was pretty expensive, or so I think.) if I lose 10 kgs. before 16^th August. I said yes to make her happy (and to convince myself that I could it); the rest of our window-shopping being a jolly good one.

It’s about 10 days to my birthday and I haven’t lost a single kilogram. I am kind of guilty and sad, but not as much as my mother or Anya. Anya has been pushing me to workout too, mainly so that she could borrow my Guess dress, if I got one. But knowing how much she loves me I’m pretty sure she wants to see me thin too. She keeps sending me links and refers websites that help you workout the right way. I look at it, not because I want to follow what is given on the sites, but because I want to respect and reciprocate her love for me. Hopefully some day, I would actually have a look at the websites and follow the instructions. Hopefully some day, I would look in the mirror and say to myself “Oh my God, is that really you?”